Last Sunday’s sermon about “Raising Good-hearted Kids” focused on intentionally bringing our children to the Lord, giving them the gift of two parents obviously in love, and meeting their needs for attention, acceptance, approval and absolutes.
Being intentional in our parenting now that our children have established their own homes means remembering to call regularly and finding creative ways to fit in a visit. It means praying for our kids and grandkids daily. And it means listening more than talking when we converse. Our adult children want us to be sounding boards, not administrative boards, and we are slowly learning that advice is appreciated more when it is sought rather than forced.
In response to Sunday’s message, I received an affirming e-mail from a friend who sent me a link to a blog written by Mindy Sauer from Buffalo, N.Y. “This story touches me,” she wrote, “because it tells the story of a family living with the loss of a child. What relates so well with your sermon is the mother talking about living again and being purposeful parents.”
Mindy lost one of her twin boys, Ben, age 5, to cancer. She and her husband, Andy, have three other children – their other son and two little girls. With only days to go until “Ben’s Heaven Day”, the anniversary of his death on May 13, 2014, Mindy wrote, “Andy and I have decided to be purposeful parents again. Intentional. Proactive. To parent our kids in a way that we remember the end-result. What we'd like for them to be like as adults. That's what we've been working on over the past few months.
“If we want them to be patient, we need to provide opportunities for them to wait for their turn. If we want them to be grateful, we need to allow them to experience the joy of working for a reward. If we want them to use proper table etiquette, we need to have instruction and practice at the dinner table.
“As sweet as our children are, it is obvious that these things are not instinctual. Being kind to your enemies, using gentle words in response to harsh ones, thinking of others before yourself... none of this comes naturally. Being a Christ-follower is about being counter-cultural. Doing the opposite of what feels natural. That's why parenting is so difficult. We are fighting an uphill battle!”
Psalm 127 has purposeful parenting in mind when it pictures children as arrows in a quiver. Arrows are made and aimed with a target in mind. Jesus identified parenting’s main target when he taught people to love God and their neighbour as they loved themselves. Loving God and neighbour does not come as naturally as loving self. That’s why parenting sometimes feels like an uphill battle. But it’s well worth the struggle.
Mother’s Day is a good day to thank God for our parents. Like us, they probably quavered in their boots as they did their best to mold the kids in their quiver into arrows that fly true.
If your mom is still alive, it’s also a good day to thank her for how you turned out. She had a part to play in that and could use some appreciation from a good-hearted kid like you!
If she is no longer alive, give your dad a call instead. If both are gone, call one of your siblings or children and share a good memory.
If it’s hard to come up with a good memory, I’m truly sorry. I hope that you can still thank God for others who met needs that your own mom or dad could or would not meet.
- Pastor Peter
Mindy Sauer’s blog can be found at “bensauer.blogspot.ca”
Being intentional in our parenting now that our children have established their own homes means remembering to call regularly and finding creative ways to fit in a visit. It means praying for our kids and grandkids daily. And it means listening more than talking when we converse. Our adult children want us to be sounding boards, not administrative boards, and we are slowly learning that advice is appreciated more when it is sought rather than forced.
In response to Sunday’s message, I received an affirming e-mail from a friend who sent me a link to a blog written by Mindy Sauer from Buffalo, N.Y. “This story touches me,” she wrote, “because it tells the story of a family living with the loss of a child. What relates so well with your sermon is the mother talking about living again and being purposeful parents.”
Mindy lost one of her twin boys, Ben, age 5, to cancer. She and her husband, Andy, have three other children – their other son and two little girls. With only days to go until “Ben’s Heaven Day”, the anniversary of his death on May 13, 2014, Mindy wrote, “Andy and I have decided to be purposeful parents again. Intentional. Proactive. To parent our kids in a way that we remember the end-result. What we'd like for them to be like as adults. That's what we've been working on over the past few months.
“If we want them to be patient, we need to provide opportunities for them to wait for their turn. If we want them to be grateful, we need to allow them to experience the joy of working for a reward. If we want them to use proper table etiquette, we need to have instruction and practice at the dinner table.
“As sweet as our children are, it is obvious that these things are not instinctual. Being kind to your enemies, using gentle words in response to harsh ones, thinking of others before yourself... none of this comes naturally. Being a Christ-follower is about being counter-cultural. Doing the opposite of what feels natural. That's why parenting is so difficult. We are fighting an uphill battle!”
Psalm 127 has purposeful parenting in mind when it pictures children as arrows in a quiver. Arrows are made and aimed with a target in mind. Jesus identified parenting’s main target when he taught people to love God and their neighbour as they loved themselves. Loving God and neighbour does not come as naturally as loving self. That’s why parenting sometimes feels like an uphill battle. But it’s well worth the struggle.
Mother’s Day is a good day to thank God for our parents. Like us, they probably quavered in their boots as they did their best to mold the kids in their quiver into arrows that fly true.
If your mom is still alive, it’s also a good day to thank her for how you turned out. She had a part to play in that and could use some appreciation from a good-hearted kid like you!
If she is no longer alive, give your dad a call instead. If both are gone, call one of your siblings or children and share a good memory.
If it’s hard to come up with a good memory, I’m truly sorry. I hope that you can still thank God for others who met needs that your own mom or dad could or would not meet.
- Pastor Peter
Mindy Sauer’s blog can be found at “bensauer.blogspot.ca”
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